Topic: Tusk (2014)

[Torgo]

It's a horror/comedy from Kevin Smith about an old man (THE Michael Parks) who gradually turns a young man (THE Justin Long) into a walrus. The reviews are fairly bad but I think with that description, that's to be expected.

I've listened to the podcast that birthed the idea. It's based on a gumtree.com ad about a man who wants a lodger, and he's willing to offer free rent...as long as the lodger dresses in a walrus costume for 2 hours a day. It turned out to be a phony ad, but it's still hilarious and Smith gave the guy who wrote it an associate producer credit.

Anyone see it? I'd like to see it but it's not playing these parts.

SCB? Sold out in your neck of the woods?

Here's the trailer, it looks so bizarre. Keep an ear out for walrus noises on the soundtrack, lolol.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCQJnOn0ru0

[SCB]

I was dreading seeing this with all the bad reviews, actually waited three months.

I've heard people say this is Human Centipede meets Misery. While that's not too far off, it's giving this movie too much credit. Both those films, even Human Centipede, goes on to achieve a successful and cohesive plot. People shit on the Human Centipede, no pun intended, but the movie and everything that happens in it makes sense within it's own context. It delivers everything it advertised and doesn't go beyond it's limits. The second one is a piece of shit though, again no pun intended.

I don't even think Kevin Smith was aware of those two films while making this. This was something he thought was original, hilarious, and shockingly awesome. The strange thing is, if this is the only Kevin Smith movie you ever see, you'd think he was some brand new director out of film school like Rob Zombie, experimenting with how to make a movie.

So this is about a douchey podcaster who gets abducted by a crazy person with a passionate fetish for walruses. And as you should know or will know by now, the main purpose of this film is to watch Justin Long turn into a walrus. I would say it's 60% Human Centipede and maybe 10% Misery, and 30% of Kevin Smith being self indulgent and masturbating at his own idea of comedy.

This is supposed to be a horror comedy. The horror I feel works in the second act, the middle, thanks to Michael Parks. He carries anything that is good in this film. He is the horror and really brings in a fantastic performance, given the stupid material he has to work with. Now the comedy in this film, well let's just say the movie isn't really funny and tries to be the entire time. The comedy fails, except a 2-3 times I'd say and all those moments include Michael Parks.

So the first act is whatever. It's setup to get Justin Long to Canada. There's a ton of attempts at comedy to make fun of the way Canadians talk and the culture clash of Americans in Canada, which didn't make sense, unless this was written by someone who hates both cultures. The second act is the best part because it's the horror and all Michael Parks.

Now the third act is where Kevin Smith ruins this movie. There's a cameo by a big A list actor and he's forced to do a very long unfunny comedy act. It isn't all bad because we're headed into the path of some sort of resolution to send us home happy, with this guy leading us there. And it could have been, had they ended the movie on a certain note, but they chose a different ending that didn't make sense in context of the film and Kevin Smith tried being too smart for his own good. Had they ended the movie where I wanted it, and I imagine others as well, I would have put this slightly below Red State, which I thought was pretty decent.

If you take Kevin Smith out of the equation and just find this movie on it's own, I would think it's one of those cases where The Human Centipede just came out and the studio behind this wanted to cash in on it, like the Asylum studio who only make straight to DVD films of existing films in theaters.

Mentioned Michael Parks several times, but I enjoyed Hayley Joel Osment. He didn't really do anything, but I liked him enough to hope he gets more work.

The special effects in this movie at random moments are pretty terrible. I'm afraid to point this out because people will say it was done on purpose as Kevin Smith doing some sort of homage to bad films, but I'm not sure based on everything else in this film.

All that being said, I enjoyed it. It is a bad movie, no doubt about it. Kevin Smith is a terrible film maker when he's not making movies about his friends acting out the thoughts in his head. But I enjoyed the first Human Centipede and watch a lot of bad horror, and this has it's moments (Michael Parks). I'd recommend this if you enjoyed films like Human Centipede, or the the modern attempts at grind house (intentional bad films like Machete and Machete Kills). After watching The Interview, this is a breathe of fresh air.

Watch it at your own risk.

[Torgo]

I was dreading seeing this with all the bad reviews, actually waited three months.

I've heard people say this is Human Centipede meets Misery. While that's not too far off, it's giving this movie too much credit. Both those films, even Human Centipede, goes on to achieve a successful and cohesive plot. People shit on the Human Centipede, no pun intended, but the movie and everything that happens in it makes sense within it's own context. It delivers everything it advertised and doesn't go beyond it's limits. The second one is a piece of shit though, again no pun intended.

I don't even think Kevin Smith was aware of those two films while making this. This was something he thought was original, hilarious, and shockingly awesome. The strange thing is, if this is the only Kevin Smith movie you ever see, you'd think he was some brand new director out of film school like Rob Zombie, experimenting with how to make a movie.

So this is about a douchey podcaster who gets abducted by a crazy person with a passionate fetish for walruses. And as you should know or will know by now, the main purpose of this film is to watch Justin Long turn into a walrus. I would say it's 60% Human Centipede and maybe 10% Misery, and 30% of Kevin Smith being self indulgent and masturbating at his own idea of comedy.

This is supposed to be a horror comedy. The horror I feel works in the second act, the middle, thanks to Michael Parks. He carries anything that is good in this film. He is the horror and really brings in a fantastic performance, given the stupid material he has to work with. Now the comedy in this film, well let's just say the movie isn't really funny and tries to be the entire time. The comedy fails, except a 2-3 times I'd say and all those moments include Michael Parks.

So the first act is whatever. It's setup to get Justin Long to Canada. There's a ton of attempts at comedy to make fun of the way Canadians talk and the culture clash of Americans in Canada, which didn't make sense, unless this was written by someone who hates both cultures. The second act is the best part because it's the horror and all Michael Parks.

Now the third act is where Kevin Smith ruins this movie. There's a cameo by a big A list actor and he's forced to do a very long unfunny comedy act. It isn't all bad because we're headed into the path of some sort of resolution to send us home happy, with this guy leading us there. And it could have been, had they ended the movie on a certain note, but they chose a different ending that didn't make sense in context of the film and Kevin Smith tried being too smart for his own good. Had they ended the movie where I wanted it, and I imagine others as well, I would have put this slightly below Red State, which I thought was pretty decent.

If you take Kevin Smith out of the equation and just find this movie on it's own, I would think it's one of those cases where The Human Centipede just came out and the studio behind this wanted to cash in on it, like the Asylum studio who only make straight to DVD films of existing films in theaters.

Mentioned Michael Parks several times, but I enjoyed Hayley Joel Osment. He didn't really do anything, but I liked him enough to hope he gets more work.

The special effects in this movie at random moments are pretty terrible. I'm afraid to point this out because people will say it was done on purpose as Kevin Smith doing some sort of homage to bad films, but I'm not sure based on everything else in this film.

All that being said, I enjoyed it. It is a bad movie, no doubt about it. Kevin Smith is a terrible film maker when he's not making movies about his friends acting out the thoughts in his head. But I enjoyed the first Human Centipede and watch a lot of bad horror, and this has it's moments (Michael Parks). I'd recommend this if you enjoyed films like Human Centipede, or the the modern attempts at grind house (intentional bad films like Machete and Machete Kills). After watching The Interview, this is a breathe of fresh air.

Watch it at your own risk.

I'll check it out. I didn't care for Red State too much, mostly because I felt like Goodman was phoning it in while Parks was delivering some really good acting.

As for Haley Joel Osment, he's in another movie, I think it's called Sex Ed. He seems to be on the verge of a minor comeback of sorts.

[Leatherface]

I agree Michael Parks is great, and he steals the movie from Justin Long, who does a really good job.  Any actor who can realistically shed tears while saying lines like "I think he's trying to turn me into a walrus" and "I don't want to die in Canada" deserves some credit. 

I am amazed at the range of Michael Parks though.  The guy is just a phenomenal actor.

But yeah, this movie was made strictly to entertain the people who enjoyed the podcast that it was based on, and for potheads and b-movie fans to re-discover years from now.  It's not good, but it's clearly not trying to be.  If you have no tolerance for overtly silly movies, then don't bother.  If you like b-movies, there are some funny moments.

[spoiler]I thought the final walrus fight was hilarious, and I wanted it to end with Depp pointing the gun and the screen cutting to black.[/spoiler]

[SCB]

That was what I was referring to about what the ending should have been. Cut off the movie right there and you have a decent B horror movie to laugh at. And that fight was also one of the few laugh out loud moments.

Other than the horrible CGI in the Kill Bill Kid video, the terrible walrus suit, I thought "finding" the cell phone was one of the laziest things I've ever seen done in a film.

[Torgo]

That was what I was referring to about what the ending should have been. Cut off the movie right there and you have a decent B horror movie to laugh at. And that fight was also one of the few laugh out loud moments.

Other than the horrible CGI in the Kill Bill Kid video, the terrible walrus suit, I thought "finding" the cell phone was one of the laziest things I've ever seen done in a film.

I liked the movie overall. It's not GOOD in the traditional sense. More like it's good for a laugh and there is genuinely good acting from Justin Long and Michael Parks, which helps sell the story in all its ridiculousness. The actor they got to play the over the top Quint character was once again doing his over the top thing, and I kind of wish he'd have taken his performance as seriously as Parks and Long seem to take theirs.

Also, in response to your initial review, Kevin Smith says right in the initial podcast that it'd be like Human Centipede except funnier. And also, in terms of where the movie should have ended...

[spoiler]That's pretty much the ending they come up with on the podcast, with her bringing him a fish in a newspaper. I think it's funny that even a year after they find him, he's still living and acting like a walrus. It literally makes no sense, but that's kind of what makes it funny.[/spoiler]